Category: family

children, family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Shot Through the Heart

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T.Puzzle on the first day of kindergarten

Oh, hello denial!  I didn’t see you standing there.  I was too busy pretending that sending T.Puzzle to kindergarten was a breeze.

Basically, this kindergarten thing has been fine and dandy with me as long as I could  accurately predict T.Puzzle’s behavior.  It’s when he starts going rogue on me and all of a sudden exhibits very Full Speed-like tendencies that all bets are off.

I was perfectly happy dropping him off as long as Full Speed escorted him to his class.  Things became dicey this week when he announced that he would no longer need Full Speed’s assistance and he would be walking in ‘all by myself!’ from here on out.

Now, I expected and accepted this kind of independent streak from Full Speed.  While I knew T.Puzzle had it in him, I thought that it would take a little longer to express on school grounds, like in ten years or so (ah, yes, there’s that lovely denial again).

As I watched T.Puzzle march to the entrance alone it felt like a bullet straight through my heart.

I will never be the same again and quite thankfully, neither will he.  I’m proud of his confidence and this softens the edges of the hurt I feel as I realize that everything has changed.

Mothers and kids must learn to separate, ‘bullet’ wounds eventually heal and the love a mother has for their child is always with them, even when they march their way towards independence.

Had I known he would grow so fast, I would have held him even tighter.
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children, family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

One Stop Shopping

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Both boys are now at the same school.  Oh, how I love one stop shopping.  I couldn’t have asked for a better first week.  Did I mention T.Puzzle started kindergarten?  I’m handling it surprisingly well.  When I feel a wave of abandonment descending upon me, all I do is picture his happy little face as he bounces out the door, and then I am reassured.  I will not allow myself to wallow in sadness when clearly, my kid is happy.  Still, I can neither confirm or deny the shedding of a tear or two on T.Puzzle’s behalf.

The week started with their school orientation and meeting their teachers.  Before entering the school premises, I sternly lectured/threatened  my boys.  They were so excited that I knew their self-control would be questionable at best.  They held it together incredibly well.  Of course, once we returned home, they wrestled like crazy for almost an hour (no injuries to report, thank you!).  I can honestly say, I have never had the urge to violently wrestle my sister after having behaved in a mannerly fashion for an extended period of time.  Not once. 

By the end of the week, a new drop-off routine has emerged.  Full Speed has taken his job as big brother seriously and escorts T.Puzzle to class in the morning.  Full Speed even stated that walking T.Puzzle to class is one of his favorite things about his new school year.  Coincidentally, that is one of my favorite things he has ever said. 

Here’s to a great school year!

children, family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Swim for Your Lives!

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Until mid-July, swimming had been a contentious subject in our home.  My boys were later than most to even tolerate the pool.  I’m guessing it had more to do with not being able to see so great without their glasses more than anything else.  I handled their general dislike of the pool by avoiding it like the plague.  Maybe not the best plan to have them overcome their fear but it was a heck of a lot easier than tantrums, tears and general mayhem. That’s all changed now.  The boys’ swim instructor quickly learned to use their fiercely competitive natures against them.   In a week they were proficient swimmers.  By the end of their four weeks of lessons they were very good swimmers.   If she wanted to work on a skill, say big arms for instance, all she had to say was, “Let’s count to see who gets the most.”  Big arm strokes would fly about as if their very lives depended on it.  It was highly entertaining to watch.

I am forever grateful that now my boys can swim and actually love the pool.  The only problem is now that they are comfortable, well, they are more like themselves in the water.  This means they are loud, competitive and displace water at high velocities.  Their replication of a Phelps/Lochte showdown is particularly splash inducing and I fear for any toddlers-in-floaties that may be in their respective ‘lanes’.  I apologize in advance if we run into you at the pool.  If you see us coming and quiet is what you want, you may want to consider going to the library instead.

children, family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Inspired

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Coach warms up his team.

If you are able to step back from the everyday details of motherhood, greater lessons are there for the taking.  I never knew being a soccer Mom could be inspirational.  I’m so glad there were those moments in the season that made me proud of my boys (all three, go Mad Dog!).

Brothers march down the field

This summer Mad Dog coached the boys in a winning season of 3v3 soccer.  When he initially moved T.Puzzle up a division, I balked.  The first set of games that I watched my 5 year-old go up against seasoned 6 and 7 year-olds, I almost fainted from anxiety.  Thankfully, the little man held his own.  I guess having a big brother beat you up on a daily basis toughens you up.  It took me to about mid-season to relax a little (I’m talking a tiny, little bit) and enjoy the games unfolding before me.  I still never enjoyed when T.Puzzle would be launched across the field because of his lack of body weight.  I did love that no matter how many times he got knocked to the ground, he always got back up and back in the game.

T.Puzzle is crushed to the field as the seemingly giant players from the opposition bring the heat.
T.Puzzle goes head to head with a player who is thankfully, more his size.

As for Full Speed, this is the season he learned that your mental game is crucial to achieve your peak, physical performance.  For the last set of season ending games, only him and my nephew (who is only 5 like T.Puzzle), were available to play.  That meant they had to play two against three for three, 24 minute games with zero substitutions.  In the final game, Full Speed pulled a miraculous 5 goals out of his back pocket leading them to a 6-1 victory.  After the game Full Speed told Mad Dog, “My body wanted to quit on me but my mind wouldn’t let it.”

How’s that for inspiration?

A determined Full Speed keeps on going!
children, family, humor, motherhood, parenting

Two. That’s All Folks!

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T.Puzzle and Full Speed getting ready for a surrey bike ride when we lived near Milwaukee a few years ago.

Agreeing to disagree on a variety of issues is a cornerstone of marriage.  There are compromises on things big and small.  As long as both involved feel they ‘win’ at least some of the time, life can run fairly smoothly.  It’s when it comes to the bigger ticket items that you both have to be completely on the same page.  For instance, the number of kids you plan to bring into the world, if any at all for that matter, must be as close as possible.  This number can change and shift as unforeseen circumstance arrive.  Initially, Mad Dog and I had talked about having a big family.  As pregnancy turned out to be one of my least favorite states of being and as Full Speed and T.Puzzle evolved into their strong-willed, glorious selves, I was quickly convinced two kids was more than enough.  Recently, Mad Dog has been pondering the possible expansion of our brood.  I think I could be open to this notion down the road, say when I’m about 90 years old and don’t remember who or where I am.  I’m sorry, but my boys have worn me out.  I believe I am only beginning to safely tread the waters of motherhood and even so, I still feel regularly challenged beyond my normal capacity.

Fortunately for me, two recent events have diminished Mad Dog’s inkling for family expansion.  First, we had lunch with friends that we hadn’t seen in a very long time and finally met their two, extremely adorable boys.  We met at a restaurant and I was flooded with memories as their very active nearly three year-old motored about the perimeter of the table and their nine month old baby insisted he needed to be held during the entire meal (to be honest, if I was that cute, I would insist on it, too).  As we talked with our friends, the little conversation we could manage over the normal hustle and bustle of raising small children, the more I appreciated my spirited boys who at least are able to independently eat a meal.  Mad Dog appreciated this, too.  This was a relief to me.

The second event was T.Puzzle’s recent surgery (he is doing fantastic by the way).  In the first days post-surgery, I had given him pain meds throughout the day and night at regular intervals.   I don’t do well with sleep deprivation (putting it mildly).  This is why the newborn phase was and never will be, my shining moment in motherhood.  Somehow, Mad Dog does not remember this.  He claims to only remember the good.  Seeing my cranky face at the end of this week managed to bring it all back into focus.  Who knew being cranky could work so much in my favor?

I think I dodged a bullet.  At least, I sure hope I did.