Category: family

family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Real Secret (of Parenting)

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I have finally stumbled upon a sure-fire way to get my boys to be pleasantly complacent.  The secret is to have them run soccer drills for three solid hours at camp every morning.  The key is that the temperature must stay in the mid-90 range and 100% humidity is a great bonus. 

My boys were so wiped after their soccer camp that they were absolute angels when I dragged them along to my allergy shot.  I’ve never seen anything like it.  They sat still (and quietly!) in the waiting area.  They were so subdued that I even let them remain seated while I went back for my shot.  As I checked my account balance behind the waiting room doors, the calm was so pervasive, I worried that the boys might have slipped into an unconscious state.  When I walked out to get them they were still sitting nicely.  Just sitting there.  Imagine!

Next week, swim lessons.  I hope their instructors train them like Olympians!

children, family, motherhood, parenting

Thanks, but No Thanks

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T.Puzzle had an excellent six month dental check-up.  Before we left for the dentist I kept reminding him that he needed to use his manners.  He goes to a great practice that takes him back alone.  Therefore, if I’m not with him reminding him every second about his manners, he has about a fifty percent success rate.

As we were leaving I asked him, “Did you remember your manners?”

“No, I forgot, Mom.  It was a long car ride over.”

children, family, motherhood, parenting

No Such Thing as Summer

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Full Speed’s version of relaxing on the beach.

The school year is almost over and summer vacation is right on our heels.  I am arming myself with positive self-talk (‘you can do it!’/ ‘they may steal your energy but never your soul!’ / ‘it really is five o’clock somewhere!’), signing the boys up for a myriad of day camps and activities and my personal favorite, good old-fashioned denial.

Ready or not, here summer vacation comes.

I have noticed that Full Speed has cranked up his hyperactivity quotient (I honestly didn’t know this was humanly possible) as his first grade year draws to a close.  I still find it hard to believe that he holds himself together in the classroom.  His teacher insists he is very well-behaved.  I imagine even the best behaved kids are prone to losing it as the excitement of summer fills the school.  I worried for his teacher because if he was acting this out of control at home, what would he be like at school?

“Full Speed, do I need to call your teacher?  Does she need to know you are way too hyper today?”  I ask.

He snaps to attention.  “No, Mom.  I know what self-control is.  Sometimes I really want to be hyper at school but then I just don’t.”  His serious expression told me he was telling the truth.

Guess he’s saving up all his hyperactivity for summer vacation and for me.

I have no response to this because in my mind, there is no summer.  It’s the only way I’ll survive until the fall.

children, family, gratitude, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

My Dolphin Tale

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Our Memorial Day weekend started off innocently enough.  We made good time, the boys were on their best behavior and I was on my way to see Winter the dolphin.

Winter, the Dolphin with no tail in Clearwater...

Winter’s story had deeply inspired me and I was looking forward to seeing her in person.  Well, after over four hours in the car and the last hour stuck in heavy traffic, my dreams of seeing Winter slowly began to splinter.  Mad Dog powered through.  He pushed me through my cranky disappointment and ignored my snarky remarks as we rode the seemingly never-ending trolley to Winter’s aquarium.  We made it with an hour to closing (paying full fare of course!) and raced to find my dolphin.

It was love at first sight.  She is the sweetest, kindest soul and I could have contentedly sat and watched her for hours.  T.Puzzle and Full Speed took one look at her and turned promptly to Mad Dog, “Where are we going next?” they demanded to know.  While I watched Winter swim lazy little loops, Mad Dog ran at warp speed from one corner of the aquarium to the next trying his best to keep the boys entertained in the tiny space.

Overall the boys were champs and I got to spend time doing something that I really wanted on our weekend getaway (a rarity as a mother of super active boys).  All was redeemed when we headed to the beach that night and the boys tried mightily to chase away all the birds.

How does one peacefully coexist in a household where your kids seem to only want to attack the very wildlife you wish to quietly observe?  I’m not exactly sure.  I know I love my boys and I don’t ever want them to change who they are.  Sit quietly, yes.  Change?

Never.

children, family, kids, motherhood, parenting

Share and Share Alike

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Keeping up with our schedule sometimes leads to two, very tired boys by the time the weekend rolls around.  Add in lots of time with extended family and by last Sunday, meltdowns were the norm.  Mad Dog gallantly tried to play a soccer game with the boys and their cousins while I enjoyed some quiet indoors.  It seemed like every five minutes one of my boys was sent inside for poor attitudes, sportsmanship (or lack thereof) and random outbursts.  As the tantrums continued, Mad Dog’s stoic exterior gave way to out-and-out frustration.  While I did not enjoy the boys’ behavior, a slight part of me was happily relieved that Mad Dog was experiencing the boys at their worst.  As a working parent, Mad Dog only sees the boys for slivers of time during the week.  Then, when he spends time with them on the weekend, they are usually in great moods because, well, it’s the weekend.   As the parent who stays home, and believe me, I do not take my time at home or with them for granted, I get to see a lot more of their ups and unfortunately their downs as well.  When Mad Dog is witness to the downside, it helps to validate my motherhood experience in its entirety. 

 Today my wish for you isn’t that your kids have lots of meltdowns for someone other than yourself (if they must, then by all means, I hope it is for someone else!), instead I hope that you have someone (partner, friend, parent or anyone that makes you feel supported) who shares the good and the bad with you.  It just makes everything better.