grief, loss of parent, mommyhood

Mom

Grandma and Grandpa with Full Speed, T.Puzzle and all the gang (minus Baby D who would join the world in three months) at Disney World December of 2008.

My ‘vacation’ is officially over and a semi-quiet has settled over my house. It is in this quietude that I can reflect back on all the fun and a little bit of the sad. It has been well over a year since my Mom’s passing and I can honestly say that the grief process has gotten better. In my everyday life I’m adjusting more and more to her absence, but when big or interesting events like this recent vacation pop up, the sting of her loss still gets me.

Mad Dog and I were married at Disney World in December of 2003. Since that time we have made several trips back there and up until her death, my Mom was always with us. This last trip without her had a lot of great moments but also had some moments we wished my Mom could be with us. Our kids only slightly picked up on our random bouts of sadness or so I thought. As my sister and her family were leaving for home yesterday, we got very emotional as we said goodbye. There was no dialogue about missing our Mom, but the emotion exchanged in the air between us was palpable.

Once my sister’s family was gone and I was left with the boys and my sad thoughts, Full Speed looks at me and says, “I miss Grandma.”

“I miss her, too and so does Aunt Skee. That’s why we seemed sad today.”

“Mom, don’t be sad. Aunt Skee has her kids to keep her happy and you have me and little T.Puzzle to keep you happy.”

My heart was warmed by his perceptive compassion but I couldn’t help but wish my Mom was right there in that moment to see it.

Miss you, Mom.

health, kids, life in pictures, mommyhood

Bump!

Before I get back to my regular observation and report of my daily life with the boys, I have to share how our recent family vacation started.

It started in the emergency room of course.

Good times.

My sister and her family arrived around one in the afternoon on their first day here. Kids were running here and there, adults were attempting to converse and Full Speed was taking his energy to a whole new level. He was beyond spastastic.

As the gang (I call them a gang because they clearly outnumbered the adults) of kids began the customary running loop at the center of our house, Full Speed gets into a rumble with a stationary door and loses.

Badly.

His head hits the edge of the door with a sick thud, he drops to the floor and starts screaming. I take one look at the bulging, bloodied mass forming on his forehead and nearly vomit (seriously!). You could actually see his blood pulsing furiously through the huge, goose-egged bump.

And off to the emergency room we go. My visiting family had only been with us roughly 30-45 minutes before this happened.

Welcome to my world, Family. Welcome to my world…

Full Speed’s injury about two hours after initial impact. By this time the swelling had gone down considerably and his energy and spunk had returned. No concussion and no stitches needed thankfully.
gratitude, happiness, mommyhood

Vacation from My Vacation

I know you all can relate. Vacations are great but sometimes it would be nice to have a few ‘recovery’ days before heading back into your normal routine. Especially if your normal routine involves the likes of T.Puzzle and Full Speed.

My sister and her family are leaving tomorrow. We have been very lucky to get to spend so much time with them. It has felt nice to reconnect with my nieces and nephews. They are a great group of kids.

Here are some of the lessons I learned on this vacation:

1. No matter how much time or distance separates you from the people you care about, the love you have for them remains constant.
2. SPF 100 does not prevent sunburn on a Florida beach in the heart of July. Ouch and ouch!
3. When you are three and five (like my boys) having your cousins around to play with is tantamount to having cookies for breakfast or watching fireworks every night (which we did our three nights at Disney last week).
4. Some of my best vacation memories will be the simple ones. Quiet conversations with my ever evolving nieces, watching my oldest nephew bond with T.Puzzle and Full Speed, marveling that my littlest nephew finally lets me hold him without tears and soaking in the chaos that is my family and loving it.

Thanks for the memories…

All the gang at Bukkets Bar and Grill oceanside JAX Beach
gratitude, happiness, mommyhood

Update

Hi Everyone! I’m missing you. It’s kind of weird but you all are becoming my cyber friends who take the time to care about what goes on in my life. It has been an exciting week full of chaos and adventure with my visiting family. We are heading to the beach tomorrow so I may not get back to full and proper posts until the end of the week.  The boys have been in their full glory entertaining their cousins, showing off for their aunt and uncle and helping my hair turn gray.

I am very lucky. Hope you are well my dear readers. I shall return soon!