Tag: Frack

kids, mommyhood

Huh?

WFAM

I was in the truck with Full Speed while Mad Dog ran into Office Max with little T.Puzzle. To pass the time, Full Speed  and I played some games. First, we had to look around us and find patterns and then we took a word and tried to rhyme it as many times as possible. The rhyming was going great. Full Speed shouts out, “Frog!”

I came up with, “Fog!”

In response I was expecting him to say log or dog. Instead he says, “Shmerce!” (rhymes with purse)

Huh?

“What’s a ‘shmerce’?” I ask.

Without missing a beat he says, “It’s a kind of smoothie.”

It doesn’t even matter to him that the imaginary word schmerce is no where close to rhyming with fog either. I know oftentimes I am living in an alternate universe from Mad Dog, now I realize, my world is completely different from Full Speed’s, too.

What can I say? It’s a dog eat dog out there. Or as Full Speed would say, ‘ shmerce eat shmerce’.

children, health

Updates

WFAM

Full Speed’s frames are irreparable. New ones have been ordered and we are back to waiting. He should have his new glasses by the time he leaves for college (hopefully).

And, I took T.Puzzle to the doc to have that bulge on the side of his neck evaluated. I tried to let it go but that thing kept staring at me.

I had to take both boys so you know it was absolute insanity. There were karate moves, climbing contests and fights over the scale to see who weighed the most (Full Speed did but only by seven pounds).

The doctor was kind and efficient, not to mention extraordinarily patient. My heart stuck in my throat as I watchfully observed him examine other regions of little T.Puzzle’s body for signs of inflammation. It took maybe thirty seconds but felt like a lifetime.

T.Puzzle got the all clear for now. I was so relieved I wanted to hug the doctor. Sure, his nodes are inflammed and swollen all up and down his neck but since that’s all the doctor could find, that’s normal for now.  T.Puzzle tested negative for strep and we were sent on our way. All I have to do is keep an eye on the node (which could stay that way indefinitely), and if I don’t see any changes like in skin color and size, he should be fine.

I do what I can to keep my boys healthy and then I have to let go of the things I cannot control. This is my challenge. This is motherhood.

kids, mommyhood

Really Bad

WFAM

In our house there is much discussion as to what constitutes a bad word. Both boys have had their share of saying naughty words at the worst possible times. I will spare you the details.

This is how Full Speed kind of understands it. “A bad word is okay if you use it to name a thing but if you use it to call someone a name, then it is bad.” For example, if you sneeze and you get snot on your arm and are simply identifying the grossness all over yourself as snot, that’s fine. However, if you see your little brother, smack him on top of his head and call him a ‘snot,’ then you are in trouble. I know this seems like an odd rule but it works in a few instances like with bottom or poop. Believe me, we’ve run the of gamut this rules’ possibilities.

This all came into play on our ride home from school today. Little T.Puzzle is singing and being generally silly. Full Speed says, “You’re weird, T.Puzzle.”

I intervene. “Please don’t refer to your brother as weird. It isn’t nice.”

“Mom, I was just saying it as a thing; I wasn’t actually calling him weird.”

The only word that came to my mind was bad. Really bad. No matter if you named it a thing, a person or a highly confounding situation brought on by my five year old.

children, mommyhood

All That Manners

WFAM

When I picked up Full Speed from school, he didn’t exactly get a glowing report from his teacher. Apparently there was some sort of scuffle over the ownership of a chair that resulted in him grabbing his classmate and choking the this classmate in anger. So……, what exactly does a Mom say in response to that?

The teacher explained that Full Speed responded to discipline appropriately and quickly doled out the proper apology to his classmate. She said that the ‘angry’ incident wasn’t enough to impact his overall report for the day. He still had received a blue snowflake (red is bad) as his final behavior mark for the day. I left feeling that although Full Speed had acted delinquently, that at least he was a polite delinquent.

Since it was Grandpa’s last night here, T.Puzzle, Full Speed and myself took him out to dinner one more time. I was a little shaken up about Full Speed’s bad report at school and I was feeling less than prepared for dealing with any antics from my boys. When the food arrived and the waiter placed Full Speed’s cheeseburger in front of him, I said, “What do you say, Full Speed?” My hope was to elicit a ‘thank you’ from him. Again, I am trying very hard to raise a polite delinquent. Instead, he shouts, “YAHOO!”

At least the waiter had a sense of humor and cracked a smile. Thankfully, tomorrow will soon be here and is another chance for me to teach my guys manners, reinforce my ‘no-choking’ policy and attempt to always, always, try to find the silver lining in the cracks of this crazy façade we call motherhood.

children, mommyhood, rock and a hard place, Uncategorized

Pet Problem

WFAM

I would give just about anything to have my dog back. I’m sure it would be a relief to Grandma and Grandpa who are so generously housing her. While T.Puzzle’s allergy to her is unfortunate, I hope that someday and some way she will come back to my house and my family.

At breakfast over syrupy waffles, Full Speed had what he thought was a lightbulb moment.

“Mom, T.Puzzle’s not allergic to cats! Let’s get a cat for a pet!”

“Well, sweetie, I’m allergic to cats so that wouldn’t work,” I say.

“Oh.”

I have clearly taken the wind from his sails. His shoulders slump and he looks defeated.

Then, another lightbulb moment. Full Speed’s face lights up as he thinks his has solved our pet problem.

“How about a horse? We can get it when he’s little and then set him free when he gets too big. Are you and T.Puzzle allergic to horses?”

No, but I’m allergic to requests and questions for which I have no answer.