gratitude – Page 5 – Writes for all Mommies

children, gratitude, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Goal is LOVE (Happy New Year)

31/12/2014 WFAM

When I began this blog, I didn’t really have any big goals. I was still grieving the profound loss of my mom, which does and doesn’t get easier, and coping with raising two rambunctious boys. I started writesforallmommies on a whim and it became a great coping mechanism for me. It allowed me to connect with others in a way that my very introverted personality sometimes doesn’t allow.

Through the years, I have had posts that click with a reader, friend or relative. That is the best feeling in the world. To know that something I wrote resonated and hopefully made them feel less alone. Let’s be honest, raising children (or life in general) can be very isolating. We feel judged as much as we judge. We question ourselves as much as we question others. We put on a brave front that we know what we are doing, when in fact, we know very little about how our actions will impact the future. It is frightening and exhilarating and mystifying and lovely all at once.

I recently received an email from a mom thanking me for my support during her daughter’s recent diagnosis of ectopia lentis. This is the same, genetic eye disorder both of my boys have. It is so rare, that it is difficult to find adequate resources on-line or anywhere at all for that matter. This mom is one of three that has contacted me through writesforallmommies.com concerning this matter.

To be able to help these moms cope with the overwhelming feelings that came with this bizarre sounding disorder has been one of the greatest rewards of writing this blog. I share this with you because if you are going through a particularly rough patch right now, know that it is preparing you to be of service to someone else. My boys were undiagnosed for a long, long time and not knowing anyone who had gone through the same experience was gut-wrenching. I know I didn’t completely prevent the feelings of despair for these women, but I eased the way and gave them hope. My boys are living proof that vision does not define them. They are awesome, adaptive and remarkable. No matter what happens with their vision down the road, they will remain awesome, adaptive and remarkable.

You are all those and more, dear reader.

Happy New Year!

gratitude, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Holiday Blessings

14/12/2014 WFAM

Another year is drawing to a close and I still marvel at all the ways motherhood continues to challenge me and make me grow. I am grateful to both my boys for always loving me even though I don’t always get things right. Their perpetual love of life inspires me. Their perpetual energy? I’m still trying to get a handle on that.

Full Speed has grown tremendously this year. His humor is getting more sophisticated and I love that he can crack me up on a regular basis. As a fourth grader, I’m fairly sure that Santa’s existence is tenuous at best for him, but he keeps holding onto the dream. I suspect he is doing it as much for me as he is for himself. That only makes me love him more.

T.Puzzle has changed dramatically. He still has threads of empathy woven permanently into his soul, but it surfaces less now. All he wants to do is play football. If he’s not playing it, he’s talking about it. I miss the sweetness of him, but I admire the competitor he’s become.

Which brings me to the new level of interaction my boys have with Mad Dog. They all live, eat and breathe football. Even my precious walks to school with the boys are now consumed with serious discussions about stats and standings.

There isn’t much I can do about it. It would be like my boys asking me not to be a writer. I can’t ask them to be something they aren’t. My job is to help them fully realize who they are. Right now that happens to be fanatical football fans. Sure it would be nice to have someone to watch romantic comedies with, take long walks in nature and sit with me in silence as we ponder life and existence.

I guess that’s why dogs were created.

children, family, gratitude, happiness, humor, kids, life in pictures, motherhood, parenting

A Year in Review (Happy New Year!)

31/12/201331/12/2013 WFAM

I am typing this with a sports-related pinkie sprain. While I have learned some great lessons this year, apparently I still am slow on the realization that my husband is a competitive beast. Even playing an innocent family game of touch football in the backyard brings out his win-at-all-costs attitude. I blame him entirely for the injury, but I blame myself for even playing in the first place.

In 2013 I think the biggest change I have noticed, especially with Full Speed, is the strange phenomena of actually being helpful without being asked. I am rendered speechless when one or both of my boys volunteers to hold a door, carry a bag, let a dog out, etc. and in turn, make my life a little bit easier. I didn’t think it was possible. That’s not to say they are perfect or that it happens all the time, it’s just a tiny, little gleaming light at the end of the tunnel for those parents up to their neck in diapers, bottles and constant demands. May this help us all set the stage for even more positive changes and growth in the coming New Year.

Another major positive change was being reunited with our dog. T.Puzzle continues to respond well healthwise to both dogs we have now, and seems to have completely outgrown his allergy to them. Honestly, we never outgrew our love for her and we never will.

Mad Dog and I celebrated our ten-year wedding anniversary. I can say without doubt, these past ten years have been the best of my life. It’s not that life somehow got magically easier once we got married, in fact, we’ve faced some pretty major life events. It has more to do with having someone in your corner that appreciates you for all the right reasons and sticks by you even when you are anything but your best. My goal for my family is to create a home that is filled with love and acceptance. With Mad Dog by my side, this goal is automatic.

Familes, people, circumstances and life are never perfect. The real lesson is to somehow find the love when all else seems dark. There are always reasons to be thankful. Sometimes it takes creativity to glean gratitude from your life. Just make sure you surround yourself with awesome people and then finding the gratitude will be easier than you think.

children, dogs, family, gratitude, happiness, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Walks are for the Dogs

03/11/2013 WFAM

It seems that as long as T.Puzzle continues to do well, the return of the dogs is permanent. Full Speed has stated that since having them home, he is the happiest he’s ever been in his whole life. T.Puzzle is excited because he is no longer the shortest living being in our household. For me, I am in my element when I am walking the dogs. There is something about their quiet company with nothing but blue sky overhead that fills my heart with joy. I have even made it a standing ritual that on most days during the week, the boys and I will walk to school with the dogs. I use the term ‘walk’ loosely. I need to invent a word that falls somewhere in between walking and standing still. I’m not sure why exactly that it takes us 45 minutes to walk a 20 minute distance. Of course once we begin our walk, I am subjected to loads of feedback concerning the weather conditions. One boy will tell me that he’s certain a blizzard is coming because it is so cold while the other thinks the wind may freeze his face off. Keep in mind, we live in a very warm climate and it’s only November where most days the temperatures still climb near 80 degrees. I have attempted some preventative measures to help minimize the climate related feedback. I brought out a pull-over hoodie for Full Speed to wear on a particularly chilly morning. He took one look at it and said he wasn’t going to wear it. Apparently, he got ‘trapped’ in it last year and he wasn’t willing to ‘go in that direction’ again. All I can say is, thank god for zippers and get your shoes on boy…it’s dog walkin’ time.

gratitude, happiness, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Beach Football

02/03/2013 WFAM

Mad Dog travelled this week so it was just me and the boys. As the boys are older, these stretches of time without Mad Dog are easier and easier. It has gotten so much easier that sometimes, I even manage to have fun with the boys. This concept of fun as I am lone-parenting was inconceivable a couple of years ago. I am so thankful for how far we’ve grown as a family.

That’s not to say that my authority isn’t tested, my patience isn’t tried and brothers don’t try to maul each other. Maybe I’ve grown immune to some of the craziness and have accepted that if my boys are awake, peace and calm have most likely left the building. It also helps when one or both of them say something so cute, it immediately erases any frustration from my memory stores.

As I was supervising evening showers, Full Speed shared his thoughts. “Mom, I know you really want a beach condo. I am going to try my best to find a way to help Dad get you that condo. How do you think I could do that?”

First of all, if you know me at all, I dream about living near the ocean on a daily basis. For that to register with my 8-year-old felt like reward enough. Secondly, a beach condo seems inconsequential to my happiness if my kid grows up to be as thoughtful and caring as he was in this moment.

“Full Speed, that is so nice of you to offer to help me and your Dad out, but don’t you worry, we’ve got that covered. All I want is for you to be happy and do something you really love when you grow up.”

He thought about what I said for a moment and then continued, “Well, maybe I could play football. Some players get a million dollars a game. If I play five games, that’s five million dollars and that could really help out.”

Sounds like a win-win, doesn’t it?