Aside – Writes for all Mommies

In recent months I have made the conscious choice to try to see the bright side of parenting. Most days I do a pretty good job of staying positive and counting my blessings. And, most days my boys give me plenty of reasons to do so. This weekend however, I couldn’t muster the strength to keep this positivity thing going. I live in a culture of competition. Literally, everything is a competition. My boys can turn the art of teeth brushing into a competitive sport. Combine this with the way they handle losing (badly is putting it extremely mildly) and it’s a lot to handle. And let’s just say Mad Dog’s win-at-all-costs mentality only seems to stoke my boys’ fire. When a family trivia game turned into an all-out meltdown, I was about ready to throw in the towel. In that moment of seeing Full Speed rage about not knowing an answer to a question, it made me realize finding something positive was going to be a real challenge for me.

If I’ve learned anything over the past years it’s that winners don’t quit. We may get knocked down, we may have our dreams of a quiet family game night dashed, but we always get back up, get that game board back out and throw down.

Maybe winning is everything.

Sure, they are all sweet and adorable until they,... aren't. — Sure, they are all sweet and adorable until they,… aren’t.

In the first game of our 3v3 season in U8 soccer, our roster of four (consisting of one eight-year old and three six-year olds in a division against seven and eight year olds), we held our own. While it ended in a tie, it was hard-fought and everyone gave their best effort. T.Puzzle even managed to score his first ever legitimate goal. In his selective remembering, it is his second goal. He is under the impression that last fall he scored. The truth is, and we haven’t had the heart to explain it, he had kicked it in the direction of the goal and while he had turned away to run his victory lap, a teammate actually nudge it in the last couple feet. So, we all celebrated as he got his ‘second’ goal. Naturally, before it even crossed into the net, he raced down the field with his arms victoriously extended in World Cup-like enthusiasm. His joy was contagious.

The second game our World Cup dreams were quickly dashed as an opponent, who it’s very possible drove himself to the field because he seemed adult-sized compared to our team, drilled goal after goal into our net. The younger kids kept on going while Full Speed broke down. When you are a passionate competitor like Full Speed, losing is like taking a bullet. In this case, it was like taking bullet after bullet. Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch….

In the end, I didn’t mind that we lost and badly. It turned into a great opportunity for the boys to learn about life. Sometimes things don’t go your way. It doesn’t matter what the outcome is as long as you handle yourself with dignity. Yes, Full Speed was crushed but he survived. Our focus in the future is to teach him that win or lose, life goes on. However, it’s a lot more fun when you are the one scoring all the goals…just ask T.Puzzle!

Asides

Winner Takes it All

Losing It (Soccer, Teeth and Otherwise)