Category: bad day

bad day, mommyhood, terrible threes

I’m Stunned

WFAM

The adventure continues… we were at the park and things were going well if you can believe it. All of a sudden Full Speed looks completely panicked. He has to ‘POOP!’

I call to T.Puzzle who completely ignores my command to hurry to the bathroom with us. He climbs higher and higher out of my grasp and smiles sweetly. He knows I can’t do a darn thing about it.

Full Speed’s panic is increasing with each passing second. His eyes are growing wider and he looks at me with pitiful eyes. “I have to poop NOW!” he insists.

I don’t really know what to do. I know what I would like to do. I would like to find a stun gun that shoots lasers and leaves prey temporarily immobile, unharmed and completely compliant. Alas, no laser-stun gun is available to me so I do the only thing I can. I leave little T.Puzzle unattended and Full Speed to the restrooms (which fortunately are right next to the playground). I tell Full Speed  he’s going to have to ‘man-up’ and poop without me in there because I have to stand outside to keep an eye on T.Puzzle. This makes Full Speed crazy with fear. He doesn’t want to be left alone in the creepy, playground bathroom and he starts to cry. “Man-up!” is all I can say to him as I run back outside.

At this point, little T.Puzzle has positioned himself so that he is completely unreachable and he looks like the cat that swallowed the canary. I. AM. LIVID.

Then, I hear Full Speed wailing and look up to find him outside the bathroom crying with his pants around his ankles. “Go back inside, I’ll be there in a minute!” I yell. I’m so frustrated that he couldn’t have just stayed put but really he is the least of my worries. T.Puzzle has yet to move to lower ground.

I run back to the bathroom, clean up Full Speed and my hands as quickly as possible and order him to wash his own hands before he returns outside. I hightail it back out to little T.Puzzle who by this time has lost his focus and has starting chasing some older kids around. He doesn’t realize I am watching him and as he descends to a spot I can actually reach, I make my move. I run at full tilt and grab him. I tuck him under my arm and use the force of my anger to help keep him locked down. I jog the best I can back to the car and Full Speed eventually follows.

The only way I may ever go back to the park or back in public with little T.Puzzle is if someone invents that stun gun I described. Help a Momma out, people.

bad day, mommyhood, tantrums, terrible threes

Oh Smack!

WFAM

I had this crazy idea that I would take the boys for haircuts. They have been rocking the mohawk look and it’s amazing how quickly it grew out. My plan was to pick Full Speed up from school and take both boys directly to the children’s salon. It is a pretty fantastic set-up. There’s a foosball table, an indoor climbing structure with a slide and an endless array of cool vehicles to sit in and watch Nickelodeon while getting your hair trimmed. They had a splendid time. I played foosball with Full Speed who insisted he was winning no matter how many times I scored. “That one didn’t count, Mom, only mine did,” (of course). Little T.Puzzle took to the slide like a fish to water (more fish similies later; I know you can’t wait but don’t get your gills in a tangle). They both did great for their trim and I was feeling really glad to have it done. Haircuts usually eat into our precious, weekend family time and I had just saved us the hassle. Win, win for sure.

Until,… it was time to leave. Little T.Puzzle absolutely refuses to leave and makes a scramble for the back of the slide structure. He is just about out of reach when I manage to grab his leg. He immediately starts screaming. Full Speed tries to help and yanks on the other leg. Full Speed accidentally tugs off little T.Puzzle’s croc in this muddled process. I see that this is a hot-button for T.Puzzle because he is really starting to lose it. As I manage to wrestle him into my arms (and by now, a crowd of sorts has gathered to watch the show), little T.Puzzle throws his arm back and smacks me squarely on the face.

I take him outside and all hell breaks loose. He’s screaming so loud I can’t think straight. I try to maneuver him to a time-out spot and quickly realize that he is violently flopping about like a dying fish so I can’t. I scoop him up and head to the truck. I grab his other croc from his foot and say he can’t have them back because he slapped me.

He is inconsolable. He cries and yells the whole way home. He is so upset he almost makes himself vomit. I get him home, send him to his room and try to regroup.

This is all stuff I’ve seen before. This isn’t the first time I’ve been smacked by one of my sons (hopefully it’s the last) and this isn’t the first outrageous tantrum I’ve endured.

But seriously, isn’t it enough already?

bad day, children

Duck and Cover

WFAM

As mother to T.Puzzle and Full Speed, I know what it takes to get through a day. I have to be strong, set lots of stern boundaries and not give them an inch. If I can’t do these things then I have to be prepared to duck and cover.

We were down to our last pull-up and I had to take little T.Puzzle with me to Target. If I am in the right frame of mind and he is too, it is a reasonable task. If I am tired, crabby and not feeling up to being a drill-sergeant mommy, then we are in big, big trouble.

I just was not in the mood to fight him at every turn. He kept tossing everything I had in the cart onto the floor. Normally, I would stop no matter if we are in the food isle or near ladies’ lingerie, and reprimand him. He would be placed in time-out and would wail to the high heavens but most likely would get his act together. I just couldn’t do it today. I wordlessly kept placing everything he tossed on the floor back in the cart. I chose to ignore his behavoir and that was the first of my mistakes.

By the time we had reached the cashier little T.Puzzle was ‘helping’ me push the cart. It was my weak attempt at distracting him from his naughty behavior. It didn’t work (another mistake). He decides now is the time to run away from Mommy and giggle. I grab him and place him in the cart’s seat and he starts screaming ‘no!’ at the top of his lungs. To complicate matters he keeps getting up in the seat dangerously teetering over the side. He looks ready to jump. I try my best to unload the cart and to make light of his insanity to the cashier. She looks wholly empathetic and mortified at the same time. As I lean down to grab something off the base of the cart, little T.Puzzle makes his move. He grabs a heavy box from the counter in front of him and proceeds to chuck it at my head. The cashier lunges forward to save me and in the process her knee hits the counter with a sickening thud. It’s her bad knee she tells me. Well, of course it is. Why would it be her good knee? That would make this story less upsetting and as you can tell, I wasn’t catching any breaks today.

I effusively apologize for the misdeeds of my child and the unfortunate injury he caused. Of course, he hasn’t let up screaming ‘no!’ yet either. I take my cart, my wobbly self-esteem and my overtly aggressive child and exit. I manage to strap him in his car seat, get my things unloaded and put the cart back. As soon as I reach the car I dial Mad Dog. I cry and he listens and when my crying gets really desperate sounding, little T.Puzzle switches his ‘nos!’ to ‘sorrys’.

It didn’t help because I was very sorry, too.

bad day, mommyhood

All Time Lowe(s)

WFAM

We are in the truck headed as a family to Lowes. Originally, we had said we would go to Home Depot, but Lowes ended up having the faucet we wanted. Full Speed  initially wasn’t too happy at our change of plan. He likes to run errands close to home (Home Depot is right outside our subdivision) and didn’t like the sound of driving what he considers far (8 miles) to the nearest Lowes. He eventually realizes it won’t be so bad and determines that Lowes is like ‘a cousin’ of Home Depot and goes forth with a good attitude.

For about all of three seconds, the boys sit nicely in the cart together and even exchange some ‘i love yous’. Mad Dog is impressed that they are getting along so nicely. I tell him to give it ten minutes and check again. Turns out we only needed about thirty seconds before things head south.

I had to put T.Puzzle in time-out, threaten Full Speed and then I had to take them both to look at kitchens so Mad Dog could have some peace to pick out what we needed. The kitchen adventure part went fairly well (we all liked the red one the best) but check-out was disastrous. I had to place little T.Puzzle in time-out again and this time he screams so loud the whole store is stopped in their tracks looking for the source of the commotion. I get the keys, grab him by the arm and half-carry, half-drag him to the truck. The entire journey to the truck he yells and screams (mostly for Mad Dog) all the while attempting to hit and kick me. I try to walk calmly and to interact as rationally as I can with him.  Mostly he just winds up in a wailing jumble in the backseat and I stay outside the truck hoping he stops.

I am tired. Tired of the embarrassment, the frustration and the constant battle. Not a great day. Not a great day at all.

bad day, kids

A First

WFAM

Full Speed had another bad report from school. Make that a rotten report. Not only did he not listen when his teacher told him not to throw mulch on the playground; he launched a handful that hit a classmate in the face causing a cut on their eyeball (thankfully it turned out to be minor).

There are many firsts in a young life. The first time a baby smiles is pretty awesome. First steps and first words are pretty spectacular, too. Then there are the smaller milestones, like using a sippy cup, getting rid of a pacifier or being big enough to wear hand-me-down spider-man pjs that one of your favorite cousins gave you.

Firsts are sometimes the things that will keep an overwhelmed mother going. They carry enough sparkle to help you shine through the tedium and get you through your worst days.

However, if the first involves your child being the only classmate to receive a red mark (bad) on the day a brand-new behavior charting system is implemented at school, you kind of want to curl up in a corner and hope that no one can see you. I think I did for a moment close my eyes and hope that like a child, if I couldn’t see the world, the world couldn’t see me. What I wouldn’t have given for some invisibility spray.

To compound an already strained situation, the boys were awful at Tae Kwon Do. Little T.Puzzle ended up disgraced and unceremoniously placed in time-out AND Full Speed lost his belt when his poor behavior report was read at the conclusion of class.

I didn’t know whether to laugh, cry or simply shut my eyes again.

Thank goodness tomorrow is another day. Maybe my boys will be perfectly well-behaved. There’s always a first, right?