Per our tradition, I was seated at the counter flanked by the boys as we ate our final lunch of summer break. I don’t know why, but lunch at the counter seems more summery than table eating.
T.Puzzle (looking rather forlorn): “Why does school have to start again?”
Me: “The first day of school is that bad, huh?”
T.Puzzle: “It’s so bad we should call it The Day That Cannot be Named. The other day I hate is Valentine’s Day. It’s all love and bleh. I don’t understand why there has to be a whole day about love. It makes no sense.”
Full Speed (courtesy of a joke book): “If you’re born in November, that means your parents had a pretty cool Valentine’s Day.”
I laughed so hard I almost spit out my food. This made Full Speed laugh which only made me laugh harder. T.Puzzle remained unmoved, I mean, it was the day before The Day That Cannot Be Named after all.
T.Puzzle shares his true feelings about returning to school.
T.Puzzle has been quite sick with a bad cold. He is finally much better. Full Speed and I gauge his health status by how much he annoys Full Speed. We knew he was really sick when he had zero energy to needle his older brother. Those were worrisome days. He’s now back to full-on annoyance mode so we are pretty sure he’s in fine health.
Over the course of T.Puzzle’s illness we have watched a lot of sports. I’m still beyond excited that the Chicago Cubs are so awesome again this season. It is something my boys and I actually want to watch together.
Sometimes, when my favorite player is up or on a commercial, I’ll pause the television and pretend he’s talking to me (forgive me, I’ve been homebound with a sick kid for days and days, my judgment is questionable at best). T.Puzzle finds this a curious thing.
“Mom, if you weren’t married to Dad, would you marry Anthony Rizzo?”
“Well, T.Puzzle, he’s a little bit too young for me.”
Full Speed, never one to be left out declares, “I’ll say!”
T.Puzzle asks, “How much older are you than him, Mom?”
Full Speed responds without missing a beat, “Sixty-four years!”
Me: “What?!?”
Full Speed: “I meant Sixty-FIVE!”
While I hold some truths to be self evident, is it really necessary to declare them all out loud?
Well over a decade ago, the girl had her First Little Buckeye.Even though she was of an age that society deemed her to be a responsible adult, she didn’t feel very grown-up and worried she wasn’t going to mother him correctly.The first time she held him in her arms was transcendent.Her worry and her fear left her.All she felt was peace.Peace for the girl is highly unusual.This is why she remembers it so vividly.She looked down into his tiny, baby face and felt comforted by him.She thought that was odd.How was a tiny baby going to take care of her?She didn’t know, but she was thankful he was here.She was grateful he was healthy.She holds that memory in a pocket close to her heart.On her hardest days, as life can be hard, she reaches into this pocket and remembers that love.That memory of peace reminds her that no matter what shows up in her world, everything is going to be okay.
Now, enough about the girl, let’s get to the fun stuff.Let’s learn a little bit more about the FLB.He loves life.He loves learning.He sometimes loves his Little Brother, but sometimes he only tolerates him.It depends on his mood and how much his Little Brother is annoying him on that particular day.
Loves his Little BrotherAbout ready to lose it on his Little Brother
The girl tries to stay out of the way. It’s hard to believe that their relationship and their lives in general aren’t really her business. She’s working on staying out of the way. She doesn’t always succeed at this. At least she is trying.
A couple months back, the FLB’s love of learning earned him a spot in the county-wide spelling bee. He managed to beat out all the other 5th and 6th graders at his school. It was a pretty amazing day. That meant over holiday break and beyond, he had to study, study, study to get ready for the Big Show at county. It was a lot of work but he didn’t mind it. He actually kind of liked the challenge of learning all these new, almost-impossible-to-pronounce-yet-harder-to-spell words. The girl remembered to stay out of his way. She told him she trusted him completely. If he wanted to study all the time or not at all, she was going to support him. He chose somewhere in between all the time and not at all. It was a good, steady balance of studying that kept his attitude good, steady and balanced. That’s all the girl cared about. She wanted him to feel good about the process and he did. So, she felt good about the process, too.
The FLB celebrating his school win
About a month before the night of the Big Show, the girl needed to have a serious talk with her FLB.She wanted him to know something very important about what her expectations were for him regarding the competition.This is what she said to him:
“I want you to remember that you are awesome.The amount of awesome you have inside you is static.That means it doesn’t change.There is nothing you can or can’t do to change this fact.At the beginning of the spelling bee you will be awesome.At the end of the spelling bee you will be awesome.And during the middle, you will still be equally awesome.Winning or losing can’t change your awesome-ness.If you wonder how I know this it’s because when you were a baby and I held you in my arms for the very first time I loved you instantly.I kind of already loved you before I even knew you.Why?It wasn’t because I thought to myself, ‘someday this kid is going to be great at spelling.’No, itwas because you were awesome.You were then, you are now and you always will be.â€
Most of the time the FLB is polite when the girl goes into one of her ‘Love-You-As-You-Are Lectures’ because let’s face it, there are SO MANY of them.The girl can’t help it.It’s who she is.The FLB knows this about her so he is respectfully quiet. The girl is never quite sure if he is actually listening to her but she lectures anyway. However this time, the girl felt like maybe this Love Lecture penetrated his soul a little.He seemed a little more sure of himself and seemed to have even more relaxed fun in his study preparations.The girl was relieved that he believed her.Sometimes as children we don’t believe the good our parents tell us about ourselves even though it is a proven fact that the good is ALWAYS TRUE.We only have to be brave enough on the inside to believe it.Thankfully, the FLB is brave enough. At least the girl hoped he was.
On the actual day of the Big Show and right before the spelling bee started, the girl’s eyes swept over the mass of talented spellers selected from each school in the county.Sure, she felt proud the FLB was included in this group but she also felt something else.This isn’t something the girl talks about very much, but growing up she kind of never really fit in anywhere.She stills feels that way. She thinks most of the whole world feels this way but no one ever says it out loud. So, as she watched those amazing, nervous kids, she could see herself in them.She could see the shy ones, the awkward ones, the ones who looked like they might pass out from nerves and she could relate.She saw the FLB way in the back row, he’s kind of small so she had to strain her neck and there he was.Yes, he seemed a bit nervous but he owned that stage.He was all confidence and class.It was if he understood he was among peers and while they may not be the considered the ‘coolest’ when in the mainstream of school life, he seemed perfectly fine about it.He is who he is and he knows he’s enough exactly as he is.The girl’s heart was full.She already won even before the first letter was spoken.She won because the FLB had already won.
He remembered he was awesome.
When he happened to place 2nd in the whole county the girl thought to herself, ‘isn’t that an embarrassment of riches?’
The FLB celebrating his 2nd place finish with his Little Brother
There are so many aspects of motherhood that get easier and easier as your children grow. It is so nice to be able to take the boys for their wellness check-ups and for the most part, they behave like normal people. For the most part,…
I no longer have concerns about Full Speed’s attitude or behavior while at the doctor. As for T.Puzzle, his behavior is generally really good, but his attitude is precarious at times.
Overall, his recent 9 year wellness-check went very smoothly. That is until we got to the portion where the doctor had to ask him direct questions. Left to his own devices, it’s hard to know what he’s going to say.
Doc: “What grade are you in?”
T.Puzzle: “Third grade.”
So far so good.
Doc: “What do you drink with your meals?”
Imperceptibly, I gulped.
T.Puzzle: “Milk.”
I’m glad he didn’t share with her the 14,000 gallons of Sprite he consumed over holiday break.
The rest of the questions he answered as you would expect. Grades? Fine. Wearing a bike helmet? Check. Favorite food to eat? Chinese (at least there are some vegetables in it, right?).
Then the questions turned to favorite hobbies.
Doc: “What do you do for fun?”
T.Puzzle: “Video games.”
I appreciated his honesty and since his weight and height were in a normal range for him, I don’t think the doctor was concerned. Also, the myriad of bruises and scars on his legs were evidence that he’s a rough and tumble kind of kid.
Doc: “What do you do to keep active?”
He looked to me to explain what she meant.
Me: “You know. When Mom and Dad make you play outside?”
He paused momentarily….
T.Puzzle: “It’s classified.”
So close…
Better luck next year!
T.Puzzle with Mad Dog celebrating turning 9 at Legoland.
A 5’6 twelve-year-old is a sight to behold. Especially in a sea of more average to small-framed kids usually seen at any given game for a U12 flag football team. Full Speed’s rather tall teammate is a huge offensive and defensive weapon. The QB only needs to launch the ball in the general vicinity of him and his giant wingspan and leaping ability almost guarantee a completion. Needless to say, it’s been a very fun season for Full Speed and his winning team.
When the news broke that our super receiver and starting QB couldn’t attend Saturday’s game, we all began to wonder how we would fare without them. My friend’s son would step in as QB, and while he had experience in this slot with previous teams, he had never run routes with this current team. And, coupled with missing our surefire receiver, where does that leave the team? Pinning our hopes and dreams on the crazy fast quickness of Full Speed.
The night before the game Full Speed’s coach had pulled him aside. He warned him to get a good night’s sleep and be prepared for a lot of hand-offs. Mad Dog and I were a little perplexed. Full Speed averaged about ten runs a game and was pretty successful even scoring an occasional touchdown, but how many more runs did that mean? Twenty? Thirty?
Oh my.
The morning of the game Full Speed pounded on our bedroom door earlier than expected.
“Can I get up now? I know it’s early but I’m too pumped up for the game to sleep.”
Oh my.
Before a game, Full Speed becomes silently serious. On the ride to the fields he was a ball of nerves and I could tell he was doing his best to be focused and brave. I didn’t know what to think. On one hand, I knew that Full Speed, as do all of us, have this remarkable capacity to step up our game when needed. On the other hand, I prayed that at least the team would remain competitive, would have a chance for other players to shine and that some positive lessons about heart and effort would be learned.
At the coin toss, the other team won possession. My stomach gave a nervous little lurch as the refs lined up the teams for the first snap. Right out of the gate the opposition passed the ball to midfield where a player handily snagged it and ran for a touchdown. I cringed as the player zipped into the end zone and worried that this was going to set the tone for the game.
Full Speed’s team lined up to hopefully answer. It seemed like a longshot. Mad Dog and I knew Full Speed was getting the ball as his right hand twitched with nervous anticipation. Then, it was on. He was off to the races. He zigged, he zagged, he juked and he spun. He kicked into this extraordinary high gear and broke the ankles of players twice his size. They all were left standing in his wake confused that this little dynamo couldn’t be caught. He ran and ran, then he ran some more. We could hear the QB say, ‘I don’t need to pass, it’s fun to watch Full Speed run all over the field.’ To the QB’s credit, as well as all the other members of the team, they all gave tremendous effort when it was needed. Even a player not known for speed, lumbered his way for an impressive gain. The other team backed off for fear of being run over. His parents were seated next to me and said that his recent growth spurt had him weighing in at 118 lbs. Full Speed weighs 64.
“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
-Mark Twain
By game’s end, Full Speed had four touchdowns, countless runs and who knows how many Heisman worthy yards gained all leading to victory.
