Little T.Puzzle and I are downtown at the eye doctor. Today is ‘pre-op’ day to prepare for his eye exam under anesthesia tomorrow.
He’s handling this better than I am. Of course a backpack full of Thomas the Train gear certainly helps.
Category: eyesight
Eye Don’t Think So
Full Speed has to start patching his right eye again. It’s not that big a deal since we’ve been patching since he was two years old for three hours a day (or so I thought). He has had a good stretch without patching because his vision improved so tremendously since his surgeries. On his last ophthalmology appointment his doctor determined patching five days a week for only an hour would be a good preventative step to keep his vision equal in both eyes. I didn’t think twice about it. I ordered some patches on-line and waited for them to arrive.
The first day of patching, and believe me, I had done a lot of prep-work talking at length with Full Speed about it, I thought it would be a breeze. Full Speed seemed good until… at the first sign of an actual patch, he lost it completely. He started screaming, turned completely red and with a body shaking so much from angry defiance, shouted repeatedly that he would ‘NEVER EVER!!!’ wear a patch.
Yeah, that was a super-fun evening. Luckily, he is older, wiser and ultimately he does what he is told. By the second day he was wearing his patch like an old pro (he thinks it’s pretty cool that he has weekends off) and all is well. However, it gave me pause to know that the out-of-control toddler temperament looms just beneath his surface.
I really should think about hiring a bodyguard.
A Little Something Extra
If you have read my recents posts, clearly I may not be excelling in the realm of motherhood at the moment. That’s why, as a Mom, it is imperative you have other outlets to help build you up during your children’s ‘difficult phases’. Of course the boys’ ‘difficult phase’ pretty much started at birth and has yet to diminish, but that is another matter for another day.
Anyway, I make valiant attempts at being a well-rounded mother. I belong to a book club so I am forced to read at least one book a month. I write this blog to prove to myself that not all of my brain cells have left me. And, I volunteer for a wonderful organization called Vision Is Priceless (for fairly obvious reasons).
This past weekend, Vision Is Priceless held their annual fundraiser. It is western-themed and BBQ (which is awesome) is served. I helped the staff set-up and did what I could at the event to lend a hand. I had a fantastic time. I met great people, had actual adult conversation (with several people no less!) and shared some of my story of our family’s vision adventures.
I am grateful my boys have had stellar eye-care from the on-set of all of their vision issues. Vision Is Priceless is working hard so that everyone who needs it may have the same.
Thanks to VIP for making me feel needed and useful. I like knowing I am helping with the bigger picture. That way on days when I am up to make neck in tantrums and smack-downs, I have a little something extra to get me through.
Bad Aim
I have to take Full Speed for another follow-up at my home away from home (the Children’s Clinic). I must admit my stress level has been through the roof. It is wearing on me to take him to all these appointments. He can sense I’m stressed so he acts out
Regardless, it went well. I should be jumping for joy. Yet, he hasn’t achieved 20/20 vision. I should be counting my blessings that his vision is equal in both eyes (holding steady at 20/60) but part of me wants to scream out in frustration. Enough already! Where’s the 20/20 vision? As a Mom I think I am allowed at least a day or two of disappointment. It’s my child’s vision for goodness sake. I want nothing but the best.
Of course my frame of mind is all off. I talked to my sister, Skee, beforehand and we are futilely attempting to see each other before the year’s end. We have too many constraints with jobs, schools and other extenuating circumstances. We both desperately want to see each other because we are dreading this holiday season like none other. Without our Mom here I think we would both prefer to skip right through to 2010.
Now, I’m at home with both boys as we are at day’s end. I have repeatedly sent them to their rooms because they can’t seem to get along. I think they know Mom is upset so that makes them act all the crazier. It’s a vicious, vicious cycle. Would it be bad if I just left them upstairs until Mad Dog or morning arrives?
I will forge ahead and continue to prepare my gourmet (is Shake ‘n’ Bake gourmet?) dinner and sit down with my two little men to partake. I need to tell them Mommy is having a bad day. I figure if I put my feelings out on the table I can’t possibly make it any worse, right?
So, we sit down to eat and I say, “Mommy’s having a rough day, she misses Grandma and feels sad.†The response? Full Speed announces he has something in his teeth and T.Puzzle smears mashed potatoes on his head. Not exactly what I was aiming for…..
Amen.
I’m feeling a bit like a blogger who has lost her words (well, only a little, as you’ll see I manage to write on). I’ve been trying to capture what I am feeling and words on a screen cannot do it justice. Full Speed got his new glasses yesterday and they are amazing. What tugged at my heartstrings most was how PROUD he was to wear them. Up until now he has worn his other glasses without complaint. I can’t imagine they were comfortable weighing down his adorable, little face and denting in the sides of his sensitive nose. Even so I was surprised at how excited he was to have his new glasses. I guess the fact that everyone in the optometrist’s office kept commenting on his extreme level of good looks in his new frames probably egged on his sense of pride (and let’s face it, an almost five year old loves to be the center of attention).
Of course during his fitting for his new frames, little brother T.Puzzle escaped from the tiny room with all the children’s frames and was peering at me through a window in the waiting area, standing on a chair of course, and saying “Hi, Mommy!†over and over. It is guaranteed chaos when we trek to the optometrist’s. It’s because it is a place wholly unequipped for the five and under set.
As we exited the office (thankfully with all display cases still intact) and I took pictures of Full Speed’s beaming smile in his new frames, I thought about what it meant. His vision has improved. He can see. My prayer for improved sight from so long ago had finally been answered.
Over the years my prayers have changed. I felt so helpless when Full Speed was initially diagnosed and it made me feel more in control in the sad, dark hours of the night to send a prayer out into the universe. I figured it couldn’t hurt an already challenging situation. Through this process, as you know, I first prayed for the betterment of his vision. Eventually, I let that prayer go (as my acceptance of his condition grew and all that went with it) and I started to pray for different things. I began to pray for strength and courage. One of the most important changes I remember was asking that wherever our journey took us as a family in life, that we would be in a place that offered the best possible eye care for my children. We moved to Florida and the rest is history. Amen.
