motherhood – Page 31 – Writes for all Mommies

gratitude, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Holiday Blessings

14/12/2014 WFAM

Another year is drawing to a close and I still marvel at all the ways motherhood continues to challenge me and make me grow. I am grateful to both my boys for always loving me even though I don’t always get things right. Their perpetual love of life inspires me. Their perpetual energy? I’m still trying to get a handle on that.

Full Speed has grown tremendously this year. His humor is getting more sophisticated and I love that he can crack me up on a regular basis. As a fourth grader, I’m fairly sure that Santa’s existence is tenuous at best for him, but he keeps holding onto the dream. I suspect he is doing it as much for me as he is for himself. That only makes me love him more.

T.Puzzle has changed dramatically. He still has threads of empathy woven permanently into his soul, but it surfaces less now. All he wants to do is play football. If he’s not playing it, he’s talking about it. I miss the sweetness of him, but I admire the competitor he’s become.

Which brings me to the new level of interaction my boys have with Mad Dog. They all live, eat and breathe football. Even my precious walks to school with the boys are now consumed with serious discussions about stats and standings.

There isn’t much I can do about it. It would be like my boys asking me not to be a writer. I can’t ask them to be something they aren’t. My job is to help them fully realize who they are. Right now that happens to be fanatical football fans. Sure it would be nice to have someone to watch romantic comedies with, take long walks in nature and sit with me in silence as we ponder life and existence.

I guess that’s why dogs were created.

children, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Teachable Moments

28/11/2014 WFAM

I love to watch movies with the boys. However, it is often difficult to agree on one that we all are willing to watch. Recently, Mad Dog persuaded me to allow the boys to watch a crazy tornado movie called Into the Storm. My boys usually do well watching movies geared slightly above their age range. We use a lot of humor to lighten the drama and it winds up being more comical than scary.

One of the reasons I love to watch movies with them is because they haven’t seen enough to understand obvious plot points. When I accurately ‘predict’ what is going to happen next, they are amazed.

For instance, Into the Storm had a scene where I correctly predicted that both the characters would live, even though all evidence pointed to the contrary. To see if Mad Dog was paying attention I said, “You know the hot girl lives. They always do.” He said an absentminded, “Yeah.”

Well, at this point, he was totally busted. I teased him and said, “What? So you admit she’s hot?”

He was backed into a corner.

As the movie progressed and this girl was in more and more peril, every time she survived, Mad Dog used it as a teaching tool. “See boys? See how the hot girl survives everything? That’s why I married your Mom. It’s the law of hotness. I will never die in a storm as long as I’m married to your Mom.”

My prediction? Mad Dog is safe for a long, long time.

children, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Naked Truth

13/11/2014 WFAM

T.Puzzle has a new friend in our subdivision. He waited to greet us as the boys and I walked home from school. His Mom introduced herself and we discussed having this friend over to our house to play. It all was great. I asked where in the subdivision they lived and I pointed out our home at the end of the cul-de-sac.

“I already knew that!” the friend piped in. “I saw T.Puzzle and Full Speed there on Halloween night! Full Speed was naked!”

I thought about that a moment and said, “He must have been in his pjs. He just wears shorts to bed.”

“Yes, his chest was naked!”

His Mom said, “That’s what you wear to bed, too. The shorts you have on now are usually the shorts you end up wearing to bed.”

As an act of joining in on our community conversation, T.Puzzle marches up to his friend’s Mom and announces,

“My Dad sleeps naked!”

Naturally embarrassed I stammered, “Sorry about the accurate yet totally inappropriate TMI.”

She did not miss a beat, “I’ll make sure we ring the doorbell before we come in.”

And thatâ€¦, is how you make new friends in the neighborhood!

children, family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Ha!

24/10/2014 WFAM

I was lulled into a false sense of security. I believed my boys would sustain normal, public behavior at length. Ha! I had a total of three errands to run with them before Full Speed’s flag football game. Not ideal to do so much at once, but sometimes, that’s just how the cards fall. The first errand went beautifully. Glasses were adjusted and manners were used. At the next stop, that’s when it began to go off the rails.

It started with Full Speed cracking a joke. Now don’t get me wrong, I love jokes. I love humor. It makes life bearable and often times, really, really fun. We were at a sporting goods store when he picked up a tiny, flowery pink pair of baby girl sport-sandals and said, “Mom, I think these would be a great gift for Dad for his birthday.” I chuckled and joined in. We were there to purchase some Under Armour for T.Puzzle. I picked up a neon-pink, leopard-printed pair of pants and said, “Hey, T.Puzzle, these are perfect for football.” This was my fatal mistake. They took Mom cracking a joke to mean that they could run wild.

First, it started with wrestling which then turned into a heated foot race which then led to them picking up teeny, tiny lavender one-pound weights and declaring, “These are the heaviest weights ever!”, as they pumped them furiously up and down.

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry so I did a little of both. The sales kid, oh, how he judged me! By this time he was helping us size shoes and the boys were continuing their spectacular display of silliness. I said, “Makes you want to have lots of kids, doesn’t it?”

Not wanting to lose the sale, the sales kid said nothing and sheepishly smiled.

When we returned to the car I had to give the boys my ‘you-better-hold-it-together-at-the-pediatrician’s-or-you-will-regret-it-dearly’ speech. It worked. We got through Full Speed’s ten-year wellness check virtually unscathed.

When do I get to run errands and not have to make threatening speeches? Does it ever happen? Or, will I always have to scare these boys straight?

Guess I better go back to the store and get some teeny, tiny lavender one-pound weights to build up my endurance because clearly, I am not there yet.

children, family, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Here’s the Break(down)

05/10/2014 WFAM

Flag football season will soon be upon us. We’ve had a marvelous, months long break from sports activity. At first when Full Speed said he needed a break, my mind went to panic mode. I thought this meant that he will never play a varsity sport. He will never fulfill his Division One destiny. He will try out, not make the first cut and then he will ‘review the tape’ of his childhood. He will then recall how he took a break sanctioned by his Mom, and proceed to blame me for the rest of his life for not making the team.

Whoa, wait a minute there irrational reality. So what? Who cares if he does or doesn’t make a team? Only society as a whole and a large portion of our community (and some family members and I’m not singling out Mad Dog per say). Ok, so maybe this isn’t the way to make sense of the insane pressure to be an elite athlete.

Honestly, I don’t know how to handle all these high expectations that my kids have to be ‘the best’ at sports. Why can’t reading be a sport? Or how about being super kind to others? As a kid, I would have DOMINATED in those. Look out Reading Olympics, I’m going for the gold!

Here’s the thing, sports can be a huge positive, but for the downside of competition, failure and feeling less-than, all a parent can do is adjust their own expectations of their children’s sport performance. Of course, I want them to succeed, but I have to have faith that the journey of sports and life, while unfortunately filled with its share of bumps and bruises, is going to be what helps them ultimately succeed as people. Yes, I said as people, not as professional athletes. I plan to cheer them on for awesome plays, showing up and for being themselves. I will never take a break from that.