Tag: Mother

gratitude, happiness, kids, marriage, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting, self-discovery

2, 4, 6, 8 Who Do I Appreciate?

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Do you ever wonder if your partner understands how hard you work to make everything seem easy? 

How when he may (or may not) reach for clothes for the kids, they are clean, neatly organized and always at hand?   This goes for karate uniforms, too.

Or, when he walks in the door, the kids are playing with each other in a respectful manner (someone had to teach them this and they need almost daily reminders of how to continue to do so), the house is clean (relatively speaking) and dinner is cared for (most nights).

And, what about all the learning these kids need to do that you have to help them with?  Eye appointments and doctors visits, too?

Believe me, I’m just getting started here.

Now, before you stop reading in protest Mad Dog, let me flip it around.

Do you ever feel like your partner understands how hard you work to provide for her and the kids?

How about all the long hours spent alone in an office (with no windows, mind you!) on endless phone calls trying to accomplish seemingly impossible business feats and doing so while making it all look easy?

What about trying to manage a team that is scattered across the nation that looks to you for leadership and expects nothing but excellence from you? 

Or the myriad of calamities and unexpected projects that pile up on your already overtaxed work schedule?

And what about the time spent away from your boys?  You know they are incredible and they grow by leaps and bounds every day, and you have to miss some of the really important and downright cool stuff.

You are handling all these things and doing it well even at great personal cost.  Does your partner get this?

Really?

I don’t know that I do.

Sometimes I’m so focused on feeling underappreciated in my own corner of the world that it begins to feel like a part-time job.

Are life and relationships ever going to be exactly how you want them to be?

Nope.

What can I do today to take care of myself, give myself the recognition I desire and honor and appreciate my partner in the process?

I love you, Mad Dog and appreciate you!

I guess that’s a start.

gratitude, happiness, humor, kids, life in pictures, marriage, mommy cliques, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting, self care (or lack thereof), self-discovery

Happy 2011, Everyone!

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Resolutions for 2011 are as follows–

T.Puzzle: To be Superman when I grow up!

That’s super, man.

Full Speed:  I promise to be the bestest boy in all the land.

Considering his initial behavior at our New Year’s lunch out by the ocean, this goal may be slightly on the lofty side.

Mad Dog:  To get fit and have more patience with my boys.

First of all, I think he looks fantastic as is and secondly, I’m thinking he wanted to add ‘and more patience with my wife’.  Since he was speaking this goal directly to me, he was wise to leave that part out.

Me:  To have more gratitude for what I already have.

Case in point...

That’s the great thing about motherhood, it gives you many reasons to be grateful.  I’m serious, mostly…, and no, I haven’t fallen and hit my head (at least not badly).

These are some of the lessons I learned throughout 2010.

1.  No matter how much you dream it or wish it, you are not in control of your life or your children.  It seems the more I try to micromanage Full Speed’s and T.Puzzle’s behavior, the more likely I am to fail and be miserable in the process.   Sometimes you have to let go and let them be who they are, even if that means they act wild sometimes, forget their manners and generally drive you and your spouse nuts.

2. On good days, motherhood is about the balance between caring for the needs of your kids and caring for your own needs.  On bad days, motherhood is about survival.  All you can do is survive until your children’s bedtime, chalk it up to a bad day and start the adventure anew the next day.

3.  When the bad stuff happens, it’s your best opportunity to learn.

4.  I am extremely lucky to have someone like Mad Dog as my children’s father.  Kids love to emulate what they see, and fortunately for me, this means they see love, respect and generosity as a way of life.

Full Speed puts his hands in his pockets just like Mad Dog on our day at the zoo.

5.  Frustration doesn’t get you very far.  Acceptance, an action plan and forgiveness go a whole lot further in this world.

6.  Having kids allows you to remember your own sense of fun.  It’s also a great excuse to wear silly hats when you ring in the new year.

Happy New Year, Everyone!
children, humor, kids, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting

Silly Me

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T.Puzzle’s hair is in a slightly awkward state.  A few millimeters of growth and it will improve dramatically.  Or, you could go Mad Dog’s preferred route and shave it all off again.  I decided to wait it out.

Since it was picture day at T.Puzzle’s school I had to take matters into my own hands.  I agonizingly shellacked his hair into place.  By the time school drop-off rolled around, his hair started to fuzz back into its original shape.  It wasn’t great but I smoothed it down best I could, fretted that it wouldn’t be picture-perfect and went on my way.

Not an hour later the school calls to tell us there was an ‘incident’.  T.Puzzle ran smack dab into a door, hit his head and was minorly injured.  However, a line had formed on his forehead in the precise spot his head connected with the door.  I was told it was red and puffy, too.  This happened right before pictures of course.

Silly me.  And I was worried his hair would be mussed.

 

Thankfully, by day's end, the injury had faded significantly.

 

children, kids, life in pictures, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting, self-discovery

King of Love

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Just when you think you are out of the woods, reality will come back and smack you in the face.  I like to believe that the physical/hands-on part of raising my boys is getting easier.  And it is.  Yet there are still moments when I look into the eyes of my offspring and all I see is a never-ending pool of need.

I had picked up T.Puzzle midday from school.  He needed his booster shot for the flu vaccine.  We were miraculously in and out of the doctor’s office in ten minutes flat (no lie!).   We had time to kill until we picked up Full Speed from kindergarten.  We headed to the park.

T.Puzzle was doing great, climbing everywhere and tumbling down the slides.  I was enjoying myself reveling in the freedom of being able to step back and watch him.   Suddenly he runs towards me holding his bottom.

Uh oh.  The holding of the bottom is never a good sign.

“I needa use the bathroom!” he exclaims.

Of course he does.  Of course we are at a park with no operational toilet facilities.  Of course. Of course.

I grab him and sprint to the car, he’s miffed at me because he is leaving the fun.  I get him strapped in as quickly as possible and hightail it to a nearby Burger King.  We race to the bathroom and make it in the nick of time.

While in the stall I have a moment where I feel the frustration rise.  The seemingly endless inconvenient potty moments specific to early childhood are getting to me.  The feeling that no matter how far I’ve come in motherhood, I am still a slave to my children and their needs.  I look at T.Puzzle.  He looks at me.

“I really love you, Mommy.  I really love you all the times,” he says.

Oh, so that’s why it’s a good thing your kids can learn to talk.  When they are this small and verbal  sometimes they say the perfect thing when you need to hear it the most.  T.Puzzle helped shift me out of my frustration and focus on what’s important.  And no, I’m not talking about improving the cleanliness of Burger King’s bathrooms because clearly this is an issue, too.  It’s about remembering when you are up to your Mommy-eyeballs in dealing with the needs of everyone but yourself, that you do it out of love.  If you hang in there, make a good effort and keep your intentions clear, you will make it through.

I love you all the times, too, T.Puzzle.

 

T.Puzzle earns a star for good behavior at Tae Kwon Do.

 

 

Mad Dog and Full Speed lend a hand out on the mat.

 

children, gratitude, happiness, humor, kids, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting, tantrums, terrible threes

Wha?

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T.Puzzle had an interesting statement.

“I not cry at drop-off today, Mommy.”

Wha?

Did my often unpredictible, at times overly emotional, fully commited to the terrible threes child tell me he wasn’t going to throw a tantrum?

I’ve heard of out of body experiences.  This was mine.

My loyal readers will understand the magnitude of what T.Puzzle was saying to me.

My motherhood journey to this moment has been anything but easy.

And now, here we are.

Tearless drop-offs for T.Puzzle.

What’s next?

Armageddon?

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