Tag: parenting

children, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Mom Knows Beast

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In a house full of men no one believes that Mom, undeniably a girl, might actually know what she is talking about.  What separates Mad Dog from the boys is that he is wise enough to keep a good attitude despite the circumstance or at the very least feign compliance.  So when it was decided that all three boys were taking Mom to see Beauty and the Beast it went over like a ton of bricks.  Like I said, at least Mad Dog pretended that was exactly how he wanted to spend his Sunday afternoon.  Little T.Puzzle was initially on board with this movie idea.  Then, after he realized that Full Speed thought the movie was going to be, “too long and very boring,” he thought he might feel the same way.

The ride to the movie theater, which thankfully is only a mile or two away, was as if we were driving to the end of the world.  The boys appeared so sad that I started to have some serious second thoughts.  However, I have sat through countless movies with robots, machine guns, karate fights, etc., that I thought these guys could suck it up and watch a singing teapot for the next hour or two. 

Turns out T.Puzzle was won over as soon as the first song played.  Full Speed leaned over and begged me to tell him if the spell of the Beast was broken by the end of the movie.  He giggled his way through the funny parts and covered his eyes when Belle was attacked by the wolves.  By all accounts, this kid was invested in what happened to the Beauty and/or the Beast.

I may not know the ins and outs of Transformers, football or dinosaurs, but maybe, just maybe, every once in a great while, I actually do know what I’m talking about.

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children, kids, motherhood, parenting

Partners in Crime

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I picked up T.Puzzle early from school today.   I had lunch with Full Speed the day before and it was my attempt to keep things equal.  Little T.Puzzle was so thrilled to see me.  We came home, had lunch and I got to enjoy a conversation with him.  Usually his older brother dominates our family talks so it was nice to let T.Puzzle speak without interruption. 

After lunch I explained that he needed to play on his own for a bit while I got caught up on some of my super very favorite things like laundry and dishwasher duty.  I’m not sure if he caught the sarcasm there.  As I attacked my chores while singing showtunes to express my joy over sorting socks, he wandered around like a lost puppy.  He eventually gave up trying to figure out what to do on his own and laid down on the couch in defeat.

I think someone is missing his partner in crime. 

T.Puzzle in happier times with Full Speed by his side.
children, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Agree to Disagree

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Even though I am a mother of two boys, I don’t understand them.  Not even in the slightest.

For example, I don’t understand random, inappropriate bodily functions at the dinner table.  I don’t understand them nor do I find them rip-roaring hilarious like my boys do.

I also don’t understand how Full Speed allowed the following to happen.  He had sustained a fairly painful knee injury at school.  Of course I gave him a generous amount of motherly sympathy and asked him how it happened.

“Well, I asked two of my friends if they could beat me up,” he replied as if this was the most normal thing in the world. 

Apparently his friends were quite successful thus the ‘terrible’ knee injury.

I asked him why he did that.

“I don’t know,” he said.

In all my years on this planet I have never once asked anyone, let alone multiple people, to beat me up.  I told Full Speed exactly that.

He smiled and shrugged at me.  I sensed he thought I might be missing out on a valuable life experience.

 Agree to disagree.

children, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Manners Game

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How do you teach your children manners?  My methods thus far have been modeling the manners I would want from my boys, and repetitive reminders to say ‘please, thank you, sir/ma’am’, hold doors for others, etc. I am officially over the repetitive reminding.  I’ve probably been over it since early 2010.  Since I don’t have a creative alternative I’m kind of stuck with what I got.  Until…

I brilliantly came up with a pebble/reward system for every time the boys use good manners in public without a reminder.  If they each fill a jar to the rim they earn a special privilege.  I especially wanted them to focus on speaking respectfully to adults.  Nothing pains me more than when a lovely elderly person asks the boys how they are doing, and the boys respond with a silly dance followed by a fall to the ground in a very unbecoming slapstick sort of way.   I was feeling good about my newly minted reward system and happy the boys showed extreme enthusiasm.  Until…

First stop was the gym.  I was headed to workout and went to drop the boys in the kid zone.  They went up to every adult in a 200 foot radius and said, “How are you doing today, ma’am/sir?”  They said, “Thank you, ma’am!” or “Thank you sir!”  if a woman or man glanced at them even in the slightest of ways (honestly, they were hard to ignore with the manners spectacular they were displaying).    They said, “You’re welcome, sir!  How are you doing today, sir?” to each other about 157 times and then tried to hold the door for every single person in the tri-county area.

At this rate I now officially owe them 497 pebbles a piece and counting. 

It’s time to tweak the rules, don’t you think?

humor, kids, motherhood, parenting, tantrums, terrible twos

New Year, New Mom…Happy 2012!

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When writing my posts I try to be honest.  My resolution for the coming year is to keep the honesty going.  Motherhood has not always been easy for me and I want to continue the truthful documentation of my triumphs and tribulations.

I would like to start this off by first of all sharing how far I have come since the birth of Full Speed.  In the seven years that I have been lucky enough to call this kid and his little brother my own, I feel like a completely new person.  I learned it was easier to accept the harsh realities of raising two extremely spirited boys than continue to fight it. The more I let go of my parenting expectations (like having a quiet house,  having children who exhibit minimal tantrums and/or power struggles, receiving gentle hugs, etc.) and embraced my kids for exactly who they are, everything started to get easier.  You can sense this evolution if you have been following my blog for a while.  The more recent my posts, the less pitiful they are.  2011 has especially been a turning point for me.  My boys are older and I am hopefully wiser (ha, ha).  I am now finally able to reconnect with parts of myself that I thought motherhood had taken forever.  My boys are more independent (sigh) and this has allowed me the freedom to return to myself a little bit more every day.

How do I know that I still have a long way to go?  Well, this is where the honesty part comes in play.  Every time I hear that a friend or family member is expecting a child, especially their first, a tiny part of me hopes that at some point their future bundle of joy will throw some serious, Grade A tantrums. There, I said it.

Full Speed, age 2, on the brink of a meltdown
Never to be outdone, T.Puzzle, age two, gets ready to rumble

I have yet to meet another Mom who has dealt/deals with as many tantrums as I have survived.  If you are out there, hang in there.  It gets better and so do the deals at the liquor store if you buy in bulk.

Anyway, I raise a glass (or two or twenty) to my best year of my motherhood experience yet.  Thank you 2011!

Can’t wait for 2012… Happy New Year to All!